Britain

Go on, show us your Bits

A row over the strategic placement of breast nipples has sparked a row over women members’ uniforms in what is left of the remnants of Britain’s Royal Navy.

A £200,000 redesign of a ceremonial jacket for female officers has been described as a ‘positive step for women.’

The Royal Navy has allocated up to £200,000 (nearly $270,000) to redesign female officers’ ceremonial uniforms.

Well tittered out

This occurred amid anxieties that the buttons on the jackets were ’inappropriately placed,’ according to an internal document cited by The Times.

Keeping abreast of things

The current jacket, which is worn by women officers at ceremonial events, features four rows of two buttons, with the top row positioned at nipple level

This has been the subject of jokes within the service. Under the redesign, all eight buttons will reportedly be moved lower on the jacket.

Breastaking News

More than 950 female officers are expected to receive the updated uniforms in phases beginning later this year. The change has been described as a ’positive step for women,’ according to the document.

Some personnel, however, have questioned the decision to spend taxpayer money on what critics described as a minor cosmetic adjustment at a time when the Navy is under pressure to improve combat readiness and modernize capabilities.

Nipple Replacement

‘The button placement on the jacket has always been a bit of a joke within the service,’ a Royal Navy source told the newspaper, calling the measure ’clearly absurd’ and adding that ’the obvious answer would have been to simply cut off the eye-catching nipple buttons on the existing uniforms.’ 

The document seen by The Times states that the majority of the planned cost, £185,000, would eventually be offset through reducing the number of uniforms issued in future.

Many titters were heard

The plan comes as Britain’s armed forces face mounting financial pressure and are being urged to cut spending amid a projected £28 billion ($37 billion) defense budget shortfall over the next four years. Despite the constraints, London continues to expand its military commitments abroad, particularly in support of Ukraine.

UK Rain

London has pledged to deploy troops on the ground in Ukraine in the event of a ceasefire, and has announced plans to provide 120,000 drones to Kyiv.

The drone package, described by the Ministry of Defense as the largest delivery of its kind, is backed by the UK’s wider £3 billion (about $3.8 billion) in military support for Ukraine this year.

This comes as part of the UK’s broader commitment of around £21.8 billion ($29 billion) in total support to Kyiv, covering military, financial, and humanitarian assistance since the Ukraine conflict escalated in February 2022.

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1 reply »

  1. LOL at Lil’ Kim laughing at comrade Starmer. More of a leg and ass man myself, I love small breasted women.

    Notice no regime change for India, North Korea, Pakistan.

    No threat to Hymie.

    Iran isn’t Venezuela or some civilians you can shoot like fish in a barrel.

    Liked by 1 person

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