MICHAEL WALSH: There is much to tell you about Europe’s dodgy economic situation but it’s best to skip that.

I was then inspired to peer into the crystal ball and see what will likely fill the vacuum when democracy collapses; back to the drawing board as democracy wasn’t there in the first place.

Life seemed to suck and then someone said; ‘Cheer up, Michael; things could get worse.’  So, I cheered up and sure enough, things did get worse. I saw a light at the end of the tunnel and then realized it was the light of an approaching train.

Things got so bad in Latvia that a not-so-dumb blonde decided to cheer their capital city up with a parade of blondes. The Latvian Association of Blondes was formed. There are so many blondes in the parade they even have their own credit cards.

We are undoubtedly going through trying times. I received a returned cheque from my bank stamped ‘Insufficient funds.’ I called to ask if they meant me or them.

It’s not much better in the United States; a truckload of Americans who hate Trump has been caught trying to sneak into Mexico

Yes, things are tough: the Mafia are laying off judges and, in the UK, politicians can be bought for a song.

Just six per cent of army uniforms were made in Britain last year under manufacturing contracts worth £ 5 million while £ 75 million worth of production was outsourced to India, China and Eastern Europe.

It is rumored that the United States has developed a new weapon that destroys people and leaves buildings intact: It is called the stock market. 

U.S. Congress is looking carefully into the Bernie Madoff scandal: Great; the guy who made $50 billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $6 trillion disappear.

Iceland went bankrupt, set itself on fire and claimed on their insurance for the ash fallout. It is said that if agreement on bailouts isn’t reached by the European Central Bank (ECB) the Spanish government will cease to function. The question being asked is, will anyone notice?

Don’t be too quick to smile; Belgium happily existed for 15 months during which period Belgium never had a functioning government. Inflation looms: If you’re not sure how much €1 trillion is hang on a few months and see if you can buy anything for it in a European department store.

A friend of mine dropped by his bank. He wanted information on how to start a small business. The bank’s business manager replied: ‘Buy a big business and wait awhile.’

Britain’s and Europe’s debt is so large that Al Qaeda is trying to figure out a way they can take credit for it.

A company director decided to award a €50 prize for the best idea that would save the company money. The prize was won by a member of the staff who suggested reducing the prize money to €10.

The credit crunch has helped many to get back on their feet; their cars have been repossessed.

The joke used to be that when you filled your Skoda car’s tank you doubled the value of the car. Now the same applies to BMWs.

When you find your bank on eBay you know you’re in trouble. This year the Nobel Prize for Economics went to pensioner Agatha Simpson. It was awarded for her idea to keep her savings under her mattress. As the saying goes; there’s many a true word said in jest. TELL US WHAT YOU THINK?  YOU CAN SHARE OUR STORIES ON SOCIAL MEDIA

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